I really want to continue my Christ posts that I wasn't able to finish last year. So I'll start a little early and see where I go with it. As I stated in my last post, if you have faith in Christ there is no room for fear. I'd like to end my year without fear, and with an increased amount of faith. We have changed the focus in our home and are trying each day to improve where we are. We are doing nightly scripture studying with scripture journals, not just reading (and hoping that they are paying attention). It has been a great experience so far and hope that it will continue. I'll take some pictures and post them of what I have made for them. 

Here is the picture that I thought of tonight due to some of the events for me today. 

Christ Healing Words

I don't know the artist to credit this picture to, sorry. 

I prayed especially hard this morning for all of my boys, including two that are not with us right now. I feel for all of them. We have been working very hard for Jimmy and Chris, there are some problems that we have been trying to overcome for them and on their behalf. Today I got one of the best calls I've had in a long time, well for the boys anyways. There is a program that is going to be able to help us, help them. I know that this is directly an answer to my prayers for them, it was not because I needed it but they DID! So when I look at this picture and see a mother wanting what is best for her son, and her Savior kneeling at her side caring, comforting and healing her little boy. I know that our Savior, my older brother, did this for my little boys today! I was able to share some of the things they will be able to help us with and the joy and PEACE that over came their faces said it all, and the healing began for one of them at that moment.

 Faith, putting it in HIS hands!

My thoughts tonight...

     I had to turn off Facebook (FB) and the Live Streaming about the Presidential Election between Mitt Romney and Barack Obama tonight because I got so frustrated on so may different levels. I did make a few comments on a few posts, but refrained from posting my own. I thought a lot about it, and really felt that I have something to say but didn't feel that FB was the place to do it and felt just as strongly that this would be the place for me to do so. Let me say why. 

     This was supposed to be MY place to record my comings and goings with my family and for my family, our family history, and a place that my children will be able to know their Mother in a way that they are unable to right now. I use to censor myself afraid that I would offend someone that was reading then posted that I wouldn't do so any longer. How can I be true to myself and my posterity and censor myself, well I can't. Also being someone that has lost both of her parents and wished that there were things I could ask them or know about them, that wasn't known before they were gone, I want my children to be able to have the ability to really know me and who I am and what I stand for. It is my responsibility and privilege to be true to myself, to my God and Savior, and to my family. I hope to always do so. Enough of that rambling!! The other reason that feel so strongly to express myself is that my boys have been very interested in this election and what it meant to them, so I want them to understand (at a latter date if not able to now) how and why I feel the way I do tonight. 

     I am disappointed in the results, that the struggles our country has gone through the past 4 years will continue for another 4 years and as many, fear may even be worse. Our family has defiantly been affected this past 4 years. I can't speak for others and wouldn't dream to be presumptuous to do so. I know that there are MANY that have suffered and know our pain and MUCH MORE. I want to only talk about some of my own family's experiences that we have gone through. We were affected by the change in Presidential Election 4 years ago when Oil Fields were closed down and many companies had to close their doors. Chad was working in the Fields at that time and found himself out of work and quickly out of options. Our lives were turned UP SIDE DOWN!! Without going into details, we were affected just like SO many in our country. We can possibly be affected GREATLY again by the outcome of tonight. I can say that it would be so easy to be angry, annoyed, enraged, exasperated, infuriated, irritated, and FEARFUL!! (OK we got the point already Tammy lol). But I am CHOOSING to NOT go down that path. I have been preparing for this outcome, and know God has a plan for us. He prepared this country for us, it is the promised land, but we also know that as the last days are approaching there is going to be much wicked and righteous upon this land. There is both on each side of the political world we all know it, as well as all around us. What I have to and choose to do is always remember: 

If you have FAITH in CHRIST there is NO room for FEAR. 

     

     So instead of being fearful for what may be, I choose to have faith in what might be! Not that I have faith in Obama or what he might do, or in his case be too lazy to do. I have faith in what God's plan is and what he has in store for me and my family and our country. I know that I have a lot of work and preparations to do. God has warned us and has had his Authorities warn and try to prepare us for what is to come. I take this as a in my face; am I ready, am I prepared? I will use this energy to draw nearer to my Savior and my God, to prepare myself and my family for the future and to draw nearer to each other. This is how I choose to go forward from tonight. 

 NO FEAR and PREPARE! 

GOD IS ULTIMATELY THE ONE IN CHARGE!!

Of all of it our Country's destiny as well as Mine.

 We all have our FREEDOM of Choice, this is my Choice!!

I'm back I hope...

I have missed blogging SO MUCH!! I was in the middle of a project that meant a GREAT deal to me, and then my computer crashed!! I had to go without a computer for a bit, that went into January. I'm not sure if I just got discouraged because I wasn't able to complete my project like I wanted and was inspired to do, or that life got REALLY crazy and busy!! On Dec 10, 2011 we had a foster placement and then another in January. Life got away from me as I was learning and growing in my new/added roll, as well as trying to work and all the other things we all do everyday. 

I have tried several times to come back to my blog and just haven't been able to for some reason, which is a shame because what it has meant to  me and where I was with it and where I had developed to. I haven't even been able to keep up with my friends blogs!?! I have given it a lot of thought and know that I need to return and continue on my journey. This was not for others as much as for me, my family, and for my boys as a journal of our lives together, for me to leave them something of myself including my testimony. I want them to know who their mother was personally someday, not just a mom and the day in and out of life. 

I am going to start where I left off with my dedication to my Savior, maybe done a little differently, our lives right now and then maybe a few random posts to cover our last year. It is important for me to journal it some for the boys. So if there is anyone left out there that remembers my blog...lol... and would like to catch up with our lives, here goes!! Thanks for coming back and hope it wont be so long for me to come back again!! :)

The white in this photo represents the purity of Christ, the Deity, the stark difference in the red really shows up. The meaning in the red is the sacrifice and blood we shed for each of us! I think this picture says so much and really speaks to my soul. Like remember me, remember what you fought for in the preexistence with me. Remember what you promised me, and never forget I am here and I live!

I have been asked many times why we are Foster Parents why we would bring these strangers and troubled souls in to our home and lives, well there are actually many reasons why and when I saw the pictures bellow those reasons were brought to my mind again so real. I have read Greg's words regarding his paintings and was inspired by them, but I would like to share my thoughts on what his paintings mean to me. 

The children that are in foster care are there for many reasons, some for the choices they have made and some for nothing that they have done at all, but the victims of someone else's choices. Either way most, if not all of them have had VERY difficult and challenging lives. They have not all known love and kindness, boundaries, shown that they are worth EVERYTHING, that they have people in their lives that care for them, keep them safe, that have taught them that the Savior LOVES them and that He sacrificed for THEM. They think that they are alone in this journey of life and that they are not worth caring for, or that they can be safe and loved. These feelings lead a lot of them to take paths that none of us would ever chose for our children or for those that we care for. They are the epitome of Christ's LOST sheep. They were once among the flock and shielded and protected from the wolves and dangers of the outside world, then the ones that were charged to care for them rejected them and went on their own paths leaving their charges to fend for themselves. 

Christ told the Pharisees in Luke 15:3-7;

And he spake this parable unto them, saying, What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it? And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbours, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost. I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.

I feel as if God has given us the ability to care for and love these lost children, to help them, and hope to guide them back to happiness and the Love of their Savior. It is not always an easy road nor not filled with complications and bumps and detours along the way. There are rewards along the path as well, tender mercies, miracles, joy, and Love. We had one young man in our home for just two days a few weeks ago and I have to say that in that time he truly touched me and my life, it was one of those times that someone touches you if even for a minute and forever imprinted themselves on your life. This is why God has lead us to this path. I only hope that we can help and impact someone's life and give them back what has been taken from them or that they have lost. As Greg's pictures depict to us Christ is there for them just as the little children, that they are just as important to Him as each of His Children are. No matter were the wayward path has taken them He is there for them and will bring them back with Him to Our Father. 

Lost and Found by: Greg Olsen

I love how Greg shows Him just sitting and listening to them. That's all they need sometimes, 

for someone to care and show them LOVE. 

 The Masters Touch by: Greg Olsen

There is of course our personal miracle that was given to us through Foster Care that was our wonderful Family! They too have been through so much and I pray that we will live up to what God has in store for them and has trusted us to do on his behalf. There is still a lot for us to do and accomplish yet, but we will all make it with the strength Christ gives us. 

THROUGH HIM ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE... 

I shared this picture on Facebook and wanted to share it here as part of my tribute.

Footprints
Also Known As "I Had a Dream"

One night I dreamed a dream.

I was walking along the beach with my Lord. Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to me and one to my Lord.

When the last scene of my life shot before me I looked back at the footprints in the sand. There was only one set of footprints. I realized that this was at the lowest and saddest times of my life. This always bothered me and I questioned the Lord about my dilemma.

"Lord, You told me when I decided to follow You, You would walk and talk with me all the way. But I'm aware that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I just don't understand why, when I need You most, You leave me."

He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you, never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you."

The Passion of The Christ (movie)

I really feel that these two pictures go hand in hand. Christ carried ALL of us when He was forced to carry His own cross to his death. It is the symbolism that is true with the the long loved poem from above. He has physically carried us on that day and continues to carry us everyday in our lives. He carries  us during our hardest, toughest, loneliest and quietest moments. I wonder if I make CHOICES that could lighten his burden from me, and give him rest. The physical burden was so great and I'm sure that the spiritual burden is just as demanding for my Lord and Savior to carry. I pray that I can make those choices and walk beside Him through this journey of life.

 I LOVE MY SAVIOR and hope to show my respect for him

 for all that he has done and sacrificed for me.

(Adversity)

I have, like so many others, gone through some very difficult times (more than once). While my posts, the research and work that I am putting into them, is truly helping with all the things that come with ADVERSITY, I thought that I would share with you some of my thoughts. I tend to do exactly what I have done with my blog, not dwell or "talk" about the problems that are going on in and around my life. As I've stated before I withdrawal, take care of the ones that are in my care, and reconsider where I am in my life and what if any needs to be adjusted. I have been doing a lot of the adjusting lately, hoping that it will not only help me but my family. One of the major adjustments has been our focus on Christ in our lives, family and home, another is the focus of our family first and the rest afterwards. We have a daily morning and evening family meeting, we have family night once a week, we have family game night once a week, and family movie night once a week. I hope that with some of these adjustments and focuses as well as others and with God's and Christ's assistance we will all be stronger for the effort we are putting in now. Strength will help us all through the adversities in life that we no doubt will all have. These are just some of the strength words that give meaning to the ones that endure, even if it's just to the end of each day as I like to say.

Perseverance, constancy, determination, drive, endurance, immovability, moxie, persistence,  purposefulness, steadfastness, tenacity, attentiveness, commitment, dedication, diligence, honor, honesty, and love.

Here are some photos and quotes that I thought shared and showed this message, including Christ and his one true adversity he had to endure, that we will never have to know because of his true and everlasting love for US his sisters and brothers.

“Adversity is like a strong wind. I don't mean just that it holds us back from places we might otherwise go. It also tears away from us all but the things that cannot be torn, so that afterward we see ourselves as we really are, and not merely as we might like to be.” 

― Arthur Golden, Memoirs of a Geisha

"I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature." John D. Rockefeller

"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no help at all." Dale Carnegie

"All great masters are chiefly distinguished by the power of adding a second, a third, and perhaps a fourth step in a continuous line. Many a man has taken the first step. With every additional step you enhance immensely the value of your first." Ralph Waldo Emerson 

"If I had to select one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being most highly correlated with success, whatever the field, I would pick the trait of persistence. Determination. The will to endure to the end, to get knocked down seventy times and get up off the floor saying. "Here comes number seventy-one!" Richard M. Devos 

"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan, 'press on' has solved, and always will solve, the problems of the human race."
Calvin Coolidge

He is there to help us, guide us, stand with us, and endure with us till the very end. He gave ALL that he had for us, he BLED for us, He cried for us, He prayed for us, and He gave his life for us. All he asks in return is for us to follow him and know him. He is close enough that if we just extend out our hand for Him He is there to receive and assist us. Have we shown our respect to Him, have we shown Him even the tiniest bit of the Love he showed us? He hasn't asked much of us but does expect ALL from us, like any parent or elder brother would expect. My hope and prayer is that YES we have and that we continue everyday to endure through the adversities of this life with his help, and show our LOVE for him by doing so.